My Waking Moment

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3 July 2012

At first glance, it is unclear whether I am wading into or away from the sunset. This photo, captured by my mother, was the turning point in my life.

The day brought the legal end to my marriage, divorce, and was just four days after wasting an opportunity of a lifetime, to get my dream job. Both the result of over 20 years beset by a debilitating stuttering disorder.

At 26 years old, I had to decided once and for all to face my fear, the resistance. However, unbeknownst to me, I had already begun to take my life back from its afflicted state to seize what could be. The momentum had accumulated from those initial decisions to propel me into my greatest fears and forced them to fade away into the sunset.

Within weeks of stepping out of the lake and into my life, I would meet my soulmate in a bar, begin an improbable quest to become an Ironman triathlete, and, for the first time of my own volition, seek professional help to heal the wounds of stuttering.

Nine years on from this moment has provided the distance from it to understand that this was when the momentum began to catalyze lasting change. All of my writing that follows will flow from how I made this effort my every waking moment. The scaffolding will be transparent enough for others to find propellers from my experience to guide their own journey.

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